What type of heartless animals create a “who’s going to get fired in six months” ranking?
Answer: CBS Sports and Dennis Dodd do!
Of course we kid, because if CBS and Dodd didn’t do it, someone would. And even Hookem.com and some sorry reporter once made an interactive map showing potential new coaches if Charlie Strong and Shaka Smart were to leave their programs.
But for the first time in several years, we can, officially, say that the University of Texas head football coach is not on the hot seat to enter the college football season (Hurrah!).
Dodd ranks 130 coaches on a scale of 0 to 5; 0 being Nick Saban coaching God level and five being sorry Charlie level.
Texas’ first year-coach Tom Herman is ranked a “1.”
That makes sense. I guess anything could happen during year one: the new lockers don’t ventilate correctly, the practice stereo system breaks, Herman shops for all his players and buys only Cookie Crisps cereal and Gushers fruit snacks, Texas doesn’t beat Oklahoma and… (have to do it) Kansas.
Outside of the Cookie Crisps and Gushers, I don’t anticipate many of those things happening, so the lowest possible ranking that isn’t on par with Nick Saban and Urban Meyer makes sense.
Where does CBS have Texas’ 2017 opponents’ coaches? Let’s take a look:
Maryland second-year coach D.J. Durkin is a “1.”
San Jose State first-year coach Brent Brennan is a “1.”
USC coach third-year coach Clay Helton is a “1.”
Kansas State billion-year coach Bill Snyder is a “0.” Which makes more sense than any coach Texas will play because Bill Snyder is Kansas State football.
Oklahoma first-year coach Lincoln Riley is a “2.” Again, makes sense because Bob Stoops retired abruptly in June to hand the reins over, so it probably means Riley has less room to fail. Oklahoma didn’t have a real chance to do a full-on coaching search, so if Riley falls flat on his face, Oklahoma may want to look elsewhere. But this isn’t likely, and Dodd’s ranking reflects that.
Oklahoma State 13th-year coach Mike “the Mullet” Gundy is a “1.” You can’t fire the Mullet… and a guy who has won 104 games at school in Stillwater, Okla.
Kansas third-year coach David Beaty is a “1.” Now, Beaty is an impressive 2-22 in two seasons at Kansas, but both wins were last season, and one was … OK, we’ll stop.
Texas Tech fifth-year coach Kliff Kingsbury is a “4.” Yeah, Kingsbury probably needs to win in Lubbock this season to improve his current 24-26 coaching record.
Second-year Iowa State coach Matt Campbell is a “1.”
First-year coach Matt Rhule is a “1.” The former Temple coach is trying to clean up a big, big, big, big, big, big (how many “bigs” do I need here to accurately express the situation?) mess and has shown a lot of promise when it comes to recruiting.
Finally, the only other “0” on this list is TCU coach Gary Patterson, who in 16 seasons in Fort Worth, is 149-54.
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